HUMP

This is a sign outside my girlfriends house, here in Valdosta. I find it so amusing. Every time I drive by it, it makes me laugh. I've never seen such a thing---BUMP--yes; HUMP--not until here. It's the littlest things, I swear!

Our Weekend

Salem sitting in the "Daddy Chair."

She LOVES her fat feet!

Watching t.v. (which I hate) with daddy

Well, lets just start off with the BS, for real. So, you ALL already know how much crap I've been having with my teeth, and to top it off, I had TWO more teeth chip just this weekend. Seriously, what am I to do? I was allergic to milk when I was younger,so I can somewhat understand that my teeth didn't grow in with enough calcium, but ALL this? So far, I think we have dropped 5 grand down the tubes just on my teeth. Now what are they going to say next week when I go in to have a tooth pulled and bridge work? Oh, I swear..............................

Moving on. So tell me....Have any of you been to a Kids Sale? If you have never heard of one, it's where you can consign your clothing, mark it up as if you were tagging it for a Thrift Shop, you get everything back of yours that does not sale; but the people that run it, get 30% of each item. My opinion--take your 30% just as long as I don't have to deal with it. The other cool part about it is that if you are a consignor, you get to go shop the night before it opens up to the public. So, tonight, my girlfriend and I went and snagged up some bargains. Oh, and the best part about it is that you can't bring your kids--how great is that? Seriously, it was so much fun just hanging out with the girls and shopping for 2 hours without anyone's child screaming/crying their heads off. The only thing that does suck about it, is that you find yourself getting things you really don't need; just because the girl next to you thought it was adorable and put it back. So, forty $'s later, and that's that.

Lesson Learned

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven..ah, I lost count of all the fat rolls!

"Mom, I told you not to show them my boobies!"

Today, was one of those days, where you teach yourself a hard, life lesson. Before I start, let it be known that I do not have a fascination with poop; I just seem to be finding myself elbows deep in it lately. So, I thought I would try giving Salem prunes to see what she thought of them yesterday, and guess what, she loved them! Also, she didn't fill her drawers at all yesterday; so I thought, what the heck! Now, I am paying for that, let me just tell you.....

*4 baths later
* 4 wardrobe changes later
* 4 loads of laundry later
* change of crib sheets later
*Oh, followed by a washing of her swing liner because she shit in that too!

She, of course, just thought it was THE GREATEST THING that has ever happened to her. She laughed and carried on while I scrubbed her, the swing, changing table, crib, bathtub, etc. You should have seen her face light up after a put her in the tub time after time, after time. She might have not thought this way before, but now I am convinced that she thinks I am the greatest Mom ever and that she shouldn't trade me in for a new one. Actually, she will probably change her mind when she finds out that I won't be meeting those same expectations tomorrow(well keep your fingers crossed that I won't be.)

To be 100% honest with you, it really was one of the best days I had with Salem. Sounds crazy, huh? The ENTIRE day was devoted to her and we just laughed through it all. We had a private Itsy Bitsy Yoga session today, followed by infant playgroup, and spent the rest of the day playing and cleaning off in the bath, which she loves. I feel like I get so wrapped up in my days doing this and that, running here and there, cleaning this broke ass apartment(Noel, give it up, no matter how much you scrub this place, it will ALWAYS be a broke ass apartment without your things and nothing more than that), cooking meals, getting online, ordering this, ordering that, going to the gym, that I KNOW I don't give Salem enough attention that I want to. Baby shit made me realize that today. All that information might be taken the wrong way. I do devote a lot of myself to her, but I know I could be giving her much more.

Uh, I'm getting all emotional now and I'm going to go check in on her sleeping.

" I'm going to eat my fist since I have nothing left in my tummy."( And still cover my boobie! )

Life in Paradise

AWWW...she's so cute! She couldn't possibly do this.......

.... Which led to Lilly doing this 7 x's throughout the house.

(If you look at the chair shot, there is a piece missing. Yes, Lilly wanted a snack....YUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKK!!

ANY QUESTIONS?

"Baby LUVS"

So, many of you have been asking for recent photos of Salem and were also wondering how in hell I kept myself together during my trip to Texas. To answer your question, not just bottles, but GALLONS of wine. Seriously, I consumed more wine in a 5 day period, than I have in YEARS. I drove myself to drink being away from her---not so I wouldn't think about her, but only because I missed her so, incredibly much. On the flip side, I was, however, busy the ENTIRE time I was there; so that helped out tremendously. I also know that she was in great care with Andrews parents and got SPOILED ROTTEN.

So, people always ask, "So, how's Salem?" And I feel dumb, but my answer is always the same. "She is getting HUGE." But seriously, she is growing bigger, and bigger by the minute. One day she can wear one of her outfits and the next day she can't. I just CANNOT get over it. She has started this new thing where she likes to feed herself her veggies/fruits with cereals. I scoop the food up for her, then she takes the spoon, sucks the goods off (that sounds bad), then hands me the spoon back to give her more. I will have to get a picture or video of this to show you guys. If I screw up the routine of it, she throws a shit-fit.

Other than the "shit-fit-food-tantrum" here and there, she is suck a "chill baby." I know, I don't know how it happened either with her being half of me. She definitely gets her calmness from Andrew. She doesn't get worked up over anything. Salem just goes with the flow; which is so not like her mama. In my opinion, I am one of THE MOST high strung chicks in the world. I'm stressed in the mornings before I even get out of bed. I love having tons of things on my plate, because I think, deep down, I enjoy the adrenaline of it all. Isn't that the stupidest thing you have ever heard? I think so.

Moving on. So this week, I basically recovered from all the wine I consumed in Texas. I also stopped hyperventilating over the house and now feel the urge to get out there and buy, buy, buy!!!! See, I knew I would get over the "buyers remorse" feeling.....I always do!!!!!! I leave you now with a picture of my "Baby Luvs," just chillin', as usual!

GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!!

Okay, use your imagination for a moment, this is our ceiling in master bedroom. The "cool" part is that there is lighting throughout the crown modling parts. Catch me?

I'm just so DONE with Georgia. It really isn't THAT bad, I just want to see my things, and now my new home! Do you ever go through phases in your life when you feel like you can't handle anything else put on your plate? Like the old saying goes..."When it rains, it pours."

For those of you who own a home, or have, or are preparing yourselves for the big purchase, I swear your whole mindset changes for a period of time. I went from buying this and that, lattes EVERY DAY; basically whatever in the hell I wanted, when I wanted it. Now, everything is flashing before my very eyes. IT IS SCARY SPENDING SO MUCH DAMN MONEY AT ONE TIME. Right now, I feel like, "Oh my God, I'm NEVER going to be able to do ANYTHING EVER AGAIN IN MY LIFE because I am BROKE as SHIT!" So much for that double oven, I won't even be able to afford enough food to cook and use the double oven.....JUST KIDDING!

Now, I'm in the mode where I want to be a total penny pincher because I would rather have the $5.00 to put towards the house, instead of a nice, warm, yummy-tasting Starbucks Cinnamon Dolce Latte coating my tonsils. DAMN YOU, YOU EXPENSIVE ASS RORY PARKER HOME. SCREW YOU AND THE LOGGING TRUCK YOU RODE IN ON!

I honestly do LOVE every single square foot of my home. My fear in life is being "house broke." I have seen many, of many of friends, who are great people, make poor real estate investment decisions. Not a single bone in my body feels that we have, but you never know what the market is going to do.

So, to wrap it all up, I am tired of living in a shitty-ass apartment. I want my stainless steel appliances, granite countertops, certain rooms that light up w/out having to turn on the switch, my GORGEOUS tub, and what have you. I'm tired of listening to our neighbors bumping and grinding....gross!

Another part that sucks is that Andrew won't be done with his program here until the beginning of April now, and then he has to go straight to SOS until the end of May. WTF? I'm so sick of Air force BULL SHIT!

I'm looking forward to having my life back this summer! I basically just through myself a "Pitty Party!" Today was just one thing after another. My ipod broke, which doesn't work for me. I am one of those weird workout people that HAS to have music while they sweat or I don't know what to do with myself. Then, to add to that, my new $150 TOP OF THE LINE NIKE shoes are giving me nerve damage in my feet. So, I basically FREAKED because I'm like, "Oh my God, I this can't be happening. I work out like a fean, and life CAN'T go on like this." I totally over exaggerated everything that happened throughout the day, when really, I should learn how to function without listening to "The Boss" while I run. My heart was RACING because HELLO, we have this house now, and I can't afford expensive things like this to be breaking on me. Back in the day, I wouldn't even bat an eye at dropping the kwan to replace the broken items. Now, It's like, "SHIT TITS, I LITERALLY can't replace the bastards." Do any of you feel the same way? Andrea? Val? Lysandra? Jamie?
I also feel like a Jackass because I just realized how many times I said LIKE throughout this post.....hilarious Noel, classic!

Entry Way

Guest bath
Family/living room
backyard

New Braunfels, Texas

I'm back from my trip of house hunting and what not. It all went very smoothly. I bought this house the very first day from a builder we had researched. He makes TO DIE for homes and we are SOOOO excited! It will be finished the end of Feb. and we close on it March 1st. They will be landscaping the front and back, and adding in an 8ft. block fence. We think it will be (cross your fingers for us) a really good investment for us in the long run. We are the first house on the block and they're builing a $550,000 home right across the street from us. It is also inside a gated community. My parents are actually buying a lot from them TODAY because they, too, think it's a great investment. What else? My FAVORITE part of the home is the kitchen......ya'll, I have a DOUBLE OVEN!!!!!! My MOM says you can't ever go back to a single after having two though. Oh, and Salem has a walk in closet too! Here are some shots....

I love it!!

I'm Out!

River Walk, here I come!

I am on my way out tomorrow to go purchase a home in San Anton. I am having mixed feelings about leaving. Salem will be staying with Andrew's parents in Florida and I am SOOOOOOOO incredibly sad about leaving her behind. It would be better if Andrew was with me, but he has to stay behind too. NO FUN FOR ME. But, my mom and stepdad are going to meet me out there and I'll be staying with Joe and Val; so that will be fun. I'll just have to drink my way through the evenings and cry myself to sleep. Wish me luck. I'll be gone for a week.

Clever UPS Man

This is funny, but annoying at the same time. So, our apartment is THE first one once you drive into the complex. So with that, it also makes us the first one on the bottom level. Lately, I have been receiving boxes at my door step not for me, but for EVERYONE in our entire complex. What the hell Mr. UPS man? At first, it was people just in our building or right next to, but lately, it has been EVERYONE. I could understand if he made a mistake like A9 for B9, or something like that; but not when we're B9 and you're giving freaking F22, bastard. I've received all sorts of goods, let me tell you! In the beginning, I was opening them because HELLO, if something is left at your door step, you think it's for you, right? I could have been the new owner of cute, little girls, Gymboree hair bows (if only Salem had hair, I would have kept them--just kidding!), a super nice full body wrap (maybe that could help me shed some pounds--dang, I should go get that one back), books, and on and on. What a lazy ass, I swear.

New Year's Resolution

May 2005-triathalon in AK

Last night I was going through our photos trying to get all the "Salem shots" organized, when I came across a random photo folder of me and my "races before baby." I immediately freaked out and realized what my New Year's resolution was going to be. "Helloooooo, I want my pre-baby body back, and the hair that goes along with it"-- I am DONE with short hair and want the long locks back. Although, it seems that it doesn't matter how hard I work, my body WILL NOT go back to the way it was. I don't lift weights as much as I used to, but I do more cardio now and I can't get the thighs to shrink; they weren't small to begin with, but at least go back to the way you damn things were. Do any of you mommies feel the same way? I can fit into my "old clothes" but they don't fit the same. You always want what you don't have--- I swear. I thought I was fat before I had a kid, and now I would give almost anything to be where I was. Please don't get wrong, Salem is everything to me (and then some), but you still want to be hot--even more so after having a child. I need more wine!

July 2005--Mt. Marathon Race in Seward, AK.